Mahan loses and wins
July 29, 2013
By Dan Daly
Editor’s Note: Be sure to follow Dan Daly's spontaneous and entertaining comments on VegasInsider.com and Twitter@_Dandaly
The four-minute mile, winning the modern Grand Slam in golf in a calendar year, finishing the NFL season 19-0 and writing an entire article that is remotely entertaining about the Canadian Open. Roger Bannister accomplished the first, Tiger came as close as anyone to the second, ditto the Patriots on the third and I am about to attempt the fourth…with very little hope. Let’s be honest, this is the Justin Bieber of “Open Championships.”
The biggest story of the week north of the Border came from Hunter “Flat-Billed” Mahan when he put the entire national media on notice that he was making a run at Phil Mickelson for father of the year on the PGA tour. In fact, based on the last two months I think Hunter Mahan might be the only other player on tour with a child besides Mickelson…but I digress.
Since no one was watching, here’s how it played out: Mahan, with a two-shot lead through 36-holes got a call from his wife that she had gone into labor three weeks early, so he withdrew from the tournament, packed up his shit and flew home in time for the birth of his daughter. As a recent father myself you might think I wouldn’t blame him one bit, however I think what he did was incredibly selfish and inexcusable. Why am I such a horrible person you ask? Well, let’s break it down.
First, let’s be crystal clear about one thing…he was going to win that tournament. He was 13-under when he withdrew. The winning score was 16-under and Mahan could have shot 4-under the last two rounds with a blindfold, a 7-iron and a putter. Despite the fact that it’s in Canada and no one watches or cares who wins, they still pay the winner $1,008,000 so he cost his caddy roughly $100k. Second, do you know how many diapers and bottles of formula a million dollars buys these days Hunter? You try explaining to your daughter next month that she can’t eat and has to sit in a wet diaper all day because daddy gave away one million dollars. That’s just bad parenting. Third, now Mahan has ruined it for every single player on tour going forward. I know they all bluff and carry a pager around and say they would leave at any point no matter when or where they stood in the tournament. Yet I think we all knew that was total crap. Now that Mr. Flat Bill actually did it with a two-stroke lead before he teed off on Saturday afternoon of a tournament he was definitely going to win, everyone after him has no choice but to leave or look like a complete asshole.
However the biggest reason I find what he did inexcusable is the fact that I had him not only in my golf pool this week but more importantly at 18/1 odds to win, and as I said earlier, there was a zero percent chance we wasn’t going to win going into the weekend. Let’s just say that my little girl will not be allowed on play dates in the Dallas area with little Zoe Mahan anytime in the near future.
And then, just to put a cherry on top of the last 7 days for me I also had Dustin Johnson at 18/1 to win this week. All he did was have a share of the lead through 70 holes before hitting a ball 700 yards out-of-bounds to make a triple bogey and lose to Snedeker by…three shots. After Westwood last week and the Mahan/DJ combo this week I am done with any golfer that ever has odds at 18/1. I know you all feel very sorry for me and I really appreciate that.
As my brother-in-law so astutely pointed out this morning, it’s kind of hilarious that at the Canadian Open had a grand total of FOUR Canadians make the cut (out of a whopping 17 to begin with) in a diluted field. And of those four, one withdrew on Saturday and the other three finished a very unrespectable t44, t49 and t52. Yeah, I think it’s time we hit the control+alt+delete button on the Canadian Open. Ok, I surrender, that’s the most I can possibly get out of the Canadian Open. The WGC and PGA Championship back to back weeks can’t get here fast enough.
Finally I would like to thank the 7,234 people that tweeted me, texted me, emailed me and called me about the Phil Mickelson story this week where he surprised everyone at Callaway and showed up with the Claret Jug. Yes, it was a very cool gesture on his part, but let’s not be overly dramatic about it. The dude lives 14 minutes away from the Callaway Headquarters, it’s not like he flew halfway across the country. Callaway is also his biggest sponsor, and if Mickelson is nothing else, he is incredible at keeping his sponsors happy. In fact, he is hands down the best pitchman in golf, and maybe all of sports. If I owned a golf related product, don’t kid yourself, Phil Mickelson would be my first phone call. Plus they put up a huge banner of him on the front of the building. Who doesn’t want to see themselves on a 50 foot banner? And yes, I’m still bitter.
Until Next Week,
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